Sekuyisikhathi eside abantu abaningi bemagange ukuveza umbono wabo. Bazizwa benesidingo sokuxolisa kusengaphambili ngokusho okuthile okunengqondo. Besaba ukukhishelwa ngaphandle ukuze bangabambeleli ekulandiseni okuvamile. Kwangathi amazwi abo angaqondwa kabi futhi ahlale ephawulwe impilo yonke. Ukuze ufakwe ohlwini lwabavinjelwe yizitha zanoma yiliphi iqembu elincane elikholelwa ukuthi umhlaba kufanele uzungeze zona.
Ngakho, ukuzihlola kukhula njengomlilo wequbula.
Nokho, self-censorship kanye kwezombusazwe zilungile okwedlulele kuvame ukuthatha isimo "sokulunga okucindezelayo". Ubulungiswa bengcindezelo buyenzeka uma sibona ukuthi ngeke sikwazi ukwabelana ngombono wethu ngoba bubekela inselele imigomo esaziwayo njengamanje. Ngakho sigcina sesilinganisa igama ngalinye nemilimitha ngaphambi kokulibiza, silihlola nasemangeleni angaba khona, siguqule ukuxhumana kube umdlalo we-juggling onqenqemeni lwensingo, siliphuce noma ibuphi ubuqiniso.
Kuyini ukuzihlola ku-psychology?
Bayanda abantu “abacubungulayo” ngokwengqondo abasuke bezokusho ngoba besaba ukucasula umuntu - noma ngabe kuhlale kukhona ozogcina ecasukile - bazama ukuthola isikhathi esifanele sokusho okuthile futhi bakhathazeke kakhulu. ngokuthi abanye bazowahumusha kanjani amagama abo. Bazizwa bekhathazekile ngokuveza umbono wabo futhi banomuzwa wesidingo sokuxolisa ngawo kusengaphambili. Ngokuvamile bathatha okubi kakhulu njengento elula futhi bakhathazeke nganoma yini engase ihambe kabi. Laba bantu bagcina bevaleleke endleleni yokuzihlola.
Ukuzihlola kuyindlela esiqaphela ngayo ngokwedlulele esikushoyo noma esikwenzayo ukugwema ukunakwa okungalungile. Yilelo zwi ekhanda lakho elikutshela ukuthi "awukwazi" noma "akumele". Awukwazi ukuveza umbono wakho, awudingi ukukhombisa lokho okuzwayo, awukwazi ukuphikisa, akumele uhambisane nokusanhlamvu. Ngamafuphi, yizwi elikutshela ukuthi awukwazi ukuba yilokho oyikho.
Kuyathakazelisa ukuthi ukuzihlola kuyanda kungakhathaliseki ukuthi imibono yomphakathi ilinganisele noma yeqise kangakanani. Abacwaningi bamanyuvesi aseWashington naseColumbia bathole ukuthi ukuzihlola kuphindwe kathathu kusukela ngeminyaka yawo-50 e-United States namuhla. Lesi simo sisabalele kangangokuba ngo-2019 abantu baseMelika abane kwabayishumi bavuma ukuzihlola, okuwumkhuba ovame kakhulu phakathi kwalabo abanemfundo ephakeme.
Lezi zazi zezepolitiki zikholelwa ekutheni ukuzithiba kwenzeka ikakhulukazi ngenxa yokwesaba ukuveza umbono ongathandeki ogcina usihlukanisa nemindeni, abangani kanye nabantu esibaziyo. Ngakho-ke, kungaba yisu nje lokusinda esikweni elinobuthi elihlukanisiwe, lapho amaqembu ahlukene azithola ehlukene ngokungenathemba enkingeni esabalele yezindaba.
Esimeni esiqinile lapho kuthathwa khona okuphambene kuphela futhi ingekho indawo yamaphuzu abalulekile amaphakathi, ukusho okungalungile kusho ukubeka engcupheni yokuthi abanye bazokukhomba njengengxenye yeqembu "lezitha" kunoma yikuphi, kusukela emithini yokugoma kuye empini. , ithiyori yobulili noma utamatisi ondizayo. Ukuze ugweme ukungqubuzana, ukucwaswa noma ukukhishwa inyumbazane, abantu abaningi bavele bakhethe ukuzihlola.
Amathenteki amade nayingozi wokuzithiba
Ngo-2009, cishe eminyakeni eyikhulu ngemva kokuQothulwa Kwesizwe Kwase-Armenia eTurkey, ngaphambili eyayiyingxenye yoMbuso Wase-Ottoman, isazi-mlando uNazan Maksudyan sahlaziya ukuthi kungakanani ukulandisa okungokomlando kwalezo zenzakalo okungafinyelela ngempela kubafundi baseTurkey namuhla futhi kungene engxoxweni yezenhlalo eqhubekayo yezwe.
Ngemva kokuhlaziya izinguqulo zesiTurkey zezincwadi zomlando, wathola ukuthi ababhali abaningi banamuhla, abahumushi nabahleli basebenzise futhi bahlanekezela idatha ethile, bavimbe inkululeko yokufinyelela olwazini. Okuthakazelisayo ukuthi abaningi babo bazihlola bona, lapho bebhekene nokubulawa kwabantu base-Armenia phakathi neMpi Yezwe Yokuqala, ukuze bagweme ukucutshungulwa komphakathi noma ukuze bathole imvume yomkhakha ovelele emphakathini.
Akukhona okokuqala kwenzeka into efana nale, futhi ngeke kube okokugcina. USvetlana Broz, owayengudokotela eBosnia ekhungethwe yimpi, wathola ukuthi abantu abaningi basiza amaSulumane kodwa bakugcina kuyimfihlo ukuze bagweme ukuziphindiselela kwesizwe sakubo. Kodwa bazizwa benesidingo esikhulu sokwabelana ngezindaba zabo.
Kunjalo, ukuzihlola kuvame ukusetshenziswa kulezo zindaba umphakathi ozithatha ngokuthi "zibucayi". Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiziphi izizathu zokuzihlola, iqiniso liwukuthi uma singakwazi ukufinyelela olwazini abanye abanalo ngenxa yokuthi bayazihlola futhi bangabelani ngalo, sonke siphuthelwa ithuba lokuhlonza izinkinga futhi sithole okungcono kakhulu esingakwenza. isisombululo. Okungakhulunywa ngakho kuba "indlovu ekamelweni" edala ukungqubuzana nokungqubuzana, kodwa ngaphandle kokuba nokwenzeka kwesixazululo.
Ukuzihlola ngokuvamile kuvela "ekucabangeni kweqembu," okubandakanya ukucabanga noma ukwenza izinqumo njengeqembu ngezindlela ezidikibalisa ukusungula komuntu ngamunye noma umthwalo wemfanelo. I-Groupthink yinto engokwengqondo eyenzeka lapho isifiso sokuzwana noma ukuhambisana singenangqondo noma singasebenzi. Ngokuyisisekelo, siyazihlola ukuze sigweme ukugxeka nokunakwa. Futhi ezimweni eziningi kungase kubonakale kunengqondo.
Kodwa-ke, ukuzihlola okusiphonsa ezingalweni ze kwezombusazwe zilungile kusiphuca ubuqiniso, kusivimbela ekubhekaneni ngqo nezindaba ezisikhathazayo noma ngisho nemibono engajwayelekile evimba inqubekelaphambili. Kaningi ngemuva kwelebula "izinkinga ezibucayi" kunokuntuleka kwangempela kokukhula komphakathi ukuze ukwazi ukuxoxisana ngokukhululekile kanye nokungakwazi ukubona imingcele yomuntu.
Njengoba isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uDaniel Bar-Tal sabhala: "Ukuzihlola kunamandla okuba yisishayo esingavimbi nje kuphela ukwakhiwa kwezwe elingcono, kodwa futhi siphuca labo abasisebenzisayo isibindi nobuqotho."
Yiqiniso, ukukhathazeka ngokusabela okungekuhle kwabanye okusiholela ekubeni sizihlole akukubi ngokuphelele. Kungasisiza sicabange kabili ngaphambi kokuba sikhulume. Kodwa-ke, izinkambiso zomphakathi ezilulaza imibono engafunwa ngokuyenga abantu ukuthi bazihlole zingenza kube lula ukuphilisana ngezinga elithile, kodwa imibono enjalo izoqhubeka nokuba khona ngoba ayizange ihanjiswe ngendlela efanele noma ishintshwe, icindezelekile kuphela. Futhi uma into icindezelwa isikhathi eside, igcina inamandla aphikisayo enza umphakathi nezindlela zokucabanga zihlehle.
Yeka ukuzigxeka ngaphandle kokuba amaphara
Ukuthatha isimo sengqondo sokuzigxeka ngokweqile, ukwenza njengabahloli abangaphezi bemicabango, amagama noma imizwa yethu ngenxa yokwesaba ukulahlekelwa ukuvunyelwa iqembu lethu lezenhlalo kungalimaza impilo yethu engokomzimba nengokwengqondo.
Ukungakwazi ukwabelana ngemibono yethu ngokwethembeka nezinye izici zempilo yethu yangaphakathi nakho kungaba yinto ecindezelayo, edala umuzwa ojulile wokuzihlukanisa. Ukuzihlola, empeleni, kuqukethe indida: siyazihlola ukuze singene eqenjini, kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo sizizwa singaqondwa kahle futhi sihlukanisiwe nalo.
Eqinisweni, kuye kwabonakala ukuthi abantu abanokuzethemba okuphansi, abanamahloni kakhulu futhi abanezingxabano ezimbalwa yilabo abavame ukuzihlola futhi balungile ngokwezombangazwe. Kodwa futhi kuye kwatholakala ukuthi laba bantu bavame ukuba nemizwa embalwa eyakhayo.
Kunalokho, ukuveza imizwa yethu kunciphisa ukucindezeleka futhi kusisondeza kubantu esabelana nabo ngezindinganiso, kusinikeze umuzwa wokuba ngabangane kanye nokuxhumana okuyisisekelo enhlalakahleni yethu.
Ukuze sigweme imiphumela elimazayo yokuzihlola ngaphandle kokubandlululwa, sidinga ukuthola ukulinganisela phakathi kwesidingo sokuziveza ngokweqiniso nokufaneleka eqenjini noma endaweni yomphakathi. Akusona isikhathi noma indawo efanele yokuba nengxoxo enzima ngaso sonke isikhathi, kodwa ekugcineni kubalulekile ukuthi kube nendawo yokubhekana nezindaba ezibucayi ezithinta thina nabanye.
Lokhu kusho futhi ukunikela ngamakhono ethu angcono kakhulu, ngaphakathi kohlu lwethu lwezenzo, ukudala isimo sokubekezelelana emibonweni eyahlukene, ngaphandle kokuwela esilingweni sokubiza abanye, ukuze wonke umuntu azizwe ekhululekile ukuveza imibono yakhe. Uma sihluleka ukwakha nokuvikela lezi zikhala zezingxoxo ngaphandle kokuthi abantu bazibone beyizitha enkundleni yempi, sizovele sihlehle ngoba imibono emihle noma izimbangela nje aziziphoqi ngokuthulisa labo abacabanga ngendlela ehlukile.
Imithombo
I-Gibson, L. & Sutherland, JL (2020) Ukugcina Umlomo Wakho Uvale: Ukuzihlola Okuqhubekayo e-United States. I-SSRN; 10.2139.
U-Bar-Tal, D. (2017) Ukuzihlola Njengomkhuba Wezenhlalo-wezombangazwe-Ngezengqondo: Ukukhulelwa Nokucwaninga. Psychology Yezombangazwe; 38 (S1): 37-65,
Maksudyan, N. (2009). Izindonga zokuthula: Ukuhumushela ukubulawa kwabantu kwe-Armenian kusi-Turkish kanye nokuzihlola. ezibucayi; 37 (4): 635-649.
Hayes, AF et. Al. (2005) Ukuzimisela Ukuzihlola: Ithuluzi Lokwakha kanye Nesilinganiso Locwaningo Lombono Womphakathi. Ijenali Yamazwe Ngamazwe Yocwaningo Lombono Womphakathi; 17 (3): 298-323.
Broz, S. (2004). Abantu abalungile ngezikhathi ezimbi. Izithombe zokusebenzisana nokumelana neMpi yaseBosnia. I-New York, NY: Okunye Iphephandaba
Umnyango Kuyini ukuzihlola futhi kungani kungafanele sikufihle esikucabangayo? yashicilelwa okokuqala ngo Ikhona lePsychology.
