Mun saba da jin yadda ake cin zarafin mata, game da gaskiyar cewa dole ne mu bayar da rahoto da neman taimako a maimakon haka sau nawa muke ji game da kare kai, ma'ana, yadda za a kare kanka?
Tashin hankali ga mata shine babban dalilin mace-mace da nakasa ga mata masu shekaru 16 zuwa 44, a cewar bincike daga Jami'ar Harvard.
Ka tuna cewa neman taimako yana da mahimmanci, amma dole ne ku zama wanda ya ɗauki matakin farko don ceton kanku. Canji koyaushe yana farawa daga ciki.
Shiga cikin kwasa-kwasan kare kai shawara ce mai fa'ida. Ta hanyar koyon fasahohin kare kai, mata na iya samun wannan kwarin gwiwa da kwarin gwiwa wanda zai basu damar samun girmamawa da nisantar wadanda suke son cutar da su.
Kare kanka yana taimaka maka ka fahimci ƙarfin ka da raunin ka sannan ka yi amfani da su don cin ribar ka idan ka zage ka. Me canzawa shine halin mutum game da yanayi mai haɗari da kuma game da masu kawo hari.
Mutane sun fara gaskatawa da nasu damar kuma basa jin tsoron ƙin yarda. Wannan amintarwar yana ba da sakamako yayin aiki da alaƙa da wasu: yanayin ya inganta, sautin murya ya zama mai yanke hukunci da amincewa tare da girmamawa ga kowa.
A cikin alaƙar soyayya sakamakon haka yake, a ƙarshe kun sami ƙarfin gwiwa don iya bayyana ra'ayinku, gaya wa ɗayan cewa ku wanzu kuma kuna da buƙatunku, kuma musamman dangane da tashin hankali na zahiri, yana iya ceton ranku!
Rikicin ilimin halin mutum:
Yana da matukar mahimmanci a yi tafiya ta ciki a lokaci guda na kare kai tare da taimakon masanin halayyar dan adam ko likitan kwakwalwa wanda zai ba da goyon baya daidai yadda za a sami canji mai ɗorewa,girman kai, yarda da kai da 'yancin wanzuwa.
Rikici yana daɗa ƙaruwa, kafin samun tashin hankali na jiki koyaushe yana farawa da tashin hankali na hankali kuma ƙwararren masani ne kawai zai iya taimaka muku.
Hare-hare na farko da suka shafi tunanin mutum sun shafi asalin mutum ne: wanda aka kashe ya sake bayyana shi ta hanyar “wawa, wawa, mahaukaci da kalmomi marasa kyau”; wata dabarar ita ce ingiza wanda aka cutar da shi ya daina amincewa da fahimtarsu da jin daɗinsu "kun yi tunanin hakan, ba ta taɓa faruwa ba".
Hasashe na biyowa, wato, sifaita halaye na wanda aka zartar ga wanda aka kashe, misali makaryaci zai fadawa wanda aka yiwa kisan cewa ita makaryaciya ce.
Amfani da laifi, barazanar, zagi da raunin ikon wasu har sai an soke shi Sun bata sunan kuma sun nisanta shi daga abokai da dangi. Suna sarrafa wanda aka azabtar ta hanyar sanya mata abin kunya game da imani da sha'awarta, suna raina ta kuma suna mata mutunci.
Duk waɗannan halayen suna haifar da wanda aka azabtar ya rasa yarda da kansa, ba da rahoto ko tawaye ba kuma ya gaskata cewa ba ta iyawa, babban bala'i na gaske!
A wannan yanayin yana da mahimmanci a gaya wa masaniyar abubuwan da suka faru don samun damar tuntuɓar gaskiya da sake gano asalin mutum.
Don kawar da kai hare-hare na hankali irin wannan yana da matukar mahimmanci kuyi imani da kanku kuma ku jingina ga gaskiyar ku.
Ka tuna cewa koyon kare kanka wata larura ce!
Wadanda ke fama da rikice-rikice na hankali da na jiki galibi su ma ana fama da tashe-tashen hankulan tattalin arziki, wato, ba su da kudin da za su samu don kubuta daga halin da suka tsinci kansu, yana da muhimmanci a san cewa akwai kuma 'yanci kai kwasa-kwasan kariya (gano game da wadanda ke garinku!) da kuma taimakon halayyar mutum a kyauta da wuraren sauraren mata!
Labari mai kyau Ilaria, ina taya ku murna!
Godiya Angie!