Amandla ebesoloko ejongwa njengokulunga. Ukomelela ebomini kunxulunyaniswa nokuqina, ukomelela kunye nokulungelelana ngokweemvakalelo. Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, sonke sifuna ukomelela. Enyanisweni, ubomi ngokwabo busifundisa ukuba sibe njalo kwaye sisakhono esifanele sihlakulele. Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha siye sibambeke kakhulu kwindima "yomelele" kangangokuba sigqibe ekubeni sizityhale ngaphaya kwemida yethu. Ngamanye amaxesha ukomelela kuyasophula. Kule nto kufuneka sifunde ukomelela ebomini, kodwa kufuneka sifunde ukuyeka, ukuphefumla okanye ukuphumla nje.
kukho ixesha lokubamba kunye nexesha lokuyeka
Ngo-2020, intshatsheli yomthambo yehlabathi izihlandlo ezihlanu uSimone Biles wothuse wonke umntu emva kokuba erhoxile kukhuphiswano lweOlimpiki yaseTokyo. Nangona ebekufanelekele ukuya kwabane bokugqibela, uthe akasazithembanga kwaye "Akazange afune ukuphuma apho kwaye enze into yobudenge kwaye enzekala." Ukwathe kufuneka ayibeke phambili impilo yakhe yengqondo. "Kufuneka sikhusele iingqondo kunye nemizimba yethu kwaye singenzi oko ihlabathi lifuna ukuba sikwenze," Uthe.
UJacinda Ardern, iNkulumbuso yaseNew Zealand, naye uye warhoxa izolo. Kwisigqibo esingaqhelekanga kwibala lezopolitiko, wavuma: “Ndiyarhoxa ngenxa yokuba indima enyhweba ngolo hlobo ibandakanya uxanduva. Uxanduva lokwazi ukuba ungumntu ofanele ukulawula nini na xa ungenguye. Ndiyawazi ukuba ubandakanya ntoni na lo msebenzi. Kwaye ndiyazi ukuba andinawo amandla aneleyo okuqhubeka nokumenzela ubulungisa. Kuko konke!"
Imizekelo yabo inqabile kwihlabathi lamanani oluntu kwaye akukho kunqongophala kwabagxeki ngokuhlehla, kodwa inyaniso kukuba ngamanye amaxesha kufuna isibindi esikhulu ukuyeka kunokuba ubambelele. Ngamanye amaxesha akufuneki nje ukuba sifunde ukomelela, kodwa sibonise nokuba sesichengeni. Kungenxa yokuba ubulumko bokwenyaniso nokulungelelana kuquka ukwazi ukuba kukho ixesha lokuxhathisa nexesha lokuyeka.
Ubunzima bokuba namandla ngokweemvakalelo
Ukomelela ebomini kunokuba lileyibhile esizichaza ngayo, sisihloko esinikwe thina, okanye “isigqubuthelo sobuso” esisinxiba ngaso esinxulumana nabanye kunye neziqu zethu. Xa sifunde ukuba namandla ngokomzwelo, ingcamango yokuyeka okanye ukungaphumeleli ayidluli kwiingqondo zethu, ngoko sinokulindela ubuninzi bethu, de siphelelwe amandla kunye namandla, kokubili ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo.
Ukomelela ebomini kudla ngokuthetha ukwenza ngathi unamandla ongasenawo okanye ungakwazi ukuvakalisa intlungu ngendlela ebesiya kuthanda ngayo. Amaxesha amaninzi ikwabandakanya ukukhusela abanye, nakuloyiko lwakho kunye nokungazithembi.
Enyanisweni, ngokuqhelekileyo abona bantu banamandla ngokweemvakalelo baba yintsika yosapho lwabo, iqela labasebenzi okanye abahlobo. Abanye bayakubona ukomelela kwabo baze bababele loo ndima, amaxesha amaninzi ngaphandle kwemvume ecacileyo.
Kuqhelekile ukuba xa umntu eqinile kwaye eqinile, azimisele ngakumbi ukusombulula iimeko ezinengxaki kwaye asebenze ngakumbi ekujonganeni nokuphazamiseka. Besele beyithethile loo nto, abanye baqala ukuhambisa kuye ulawulo lweentlekele zabo. Bacinga, ngokungathi yinto yemvelo, ukuba babeke umthwalo weengxaki nobunzima babo kubo.
Ngenxa yoko, abantu abomeleleyo ngokweemvakalelo baphela bethwele umthwalo onzima kakhulu emagxeni abo, kuba iingxaki zabo nokungakhuseleki kwabo kongezwa zezabanye.
Ewe, akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngaloo mandla asenza intsika yabanye, ukuba nje sinokuthatha loo ndima. Abanye abantu banamandla amakhulu okoyisa ubunzima kunye nokujongana nobunzima, nto leyo ebenza babe bhetele kunabanye.
Noko ke, nabantu abomeleleyo bayadinwa. Maxa wambi basenokungakwazi ukuyiphumeza loo ndima, kodwa nangona kunjalo, abanye balindele ukuba baqhubeke besenjenjalo, kwanokuba oko kuya kulahlekelwa yimpilo yabo engokwengqondo okanye yomzimba. Ngelo xesha, ukomelela kuba ngumcimbi.
Imeko iba nzima ngakumbi xa umgcini weengxaki – ezinkulu okanye ezincinci – ephela ebizwa ukuba athathe indima yakhe, azive enetyala xa echasa okanye esala ukwenza oko. Ngeli xesha abanye bagqibezela ngokuthatha isikhundla esitofotofo, esiphantse sibe bumntwana, belahla inxalenye yokuzimela noxanduva lwabo.
Ukuba loo mntu akanawo amandla okuqhawula kwindima yakhe athi "kwanele!", kusenokwenzeka ukuba ekugqibeleni uya kutsha.
Ukophula ukungunda
Kubudlelwane nomntu owomeleleyo ngokweemvakalelo, kuhlala kukho izinto zokukhohlisa. Oko "komelele" kunokugqibela ekubeni sisisixhobo sabaninzi - amaxesha amaninzi bengazi. Ngaloo ndlela isangqa esikhohlakeleyo senziwa. I-dynamics itshintsha kuphela xa umntu engenakukwazi ukuyithatha kwaye ufumana umonakalo othile obenza bangabikho emehlweni abanye ukuze bangakwazi ukuqhubeka bethatha loo ndima.
Nangona kunjalo, ukunqanda ukufikelela kwinqanaba lokwaphuka, kufuneka wazi indlela yokuyeka ngaphambili. Kuya kufuneka wazi ukuba wonke umntu, kwanabona banamandla ngokweemvakalelo, banelungelo lokuphumla, beziva besoyika kwaye bengazi ukuba mabenze ntoni na, baveze iimvakalelo zakho, ukuba nomsindo, bahlukane, baphefumle kwaye baphumle. Kuba, ekugqibeleni, wonke umntu kufuneka abe noxanduva ngolonwabo lwakhe. Kwaye ukuba somelele kakhulu, loo ndima ekugqibeleni iya kusenza buthathaka, ngaphakathi nangaphandle.
Umnyango Ukuba namandla ebomini, "i-contraindications" ekungekho mntu ukuxelela yona yaqala ukupapashwa ngo Ikhonkco lePsychology.
