Akakwazi ukubonakalisa iimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo, kubangela imvakalelo yokukhathazeka kumfazi ongavakalelwa njengobuyiswa njengoko ebeya kuthanda.
Ngaba ngokwenene indoda engenaluthando ayinyangeki? Impendulo yengcaphephe:
NguAlice Rosati
Nabani na oye wathandana nendoda eyathi, nangona ubuhlobo obuzinzile, akazange amthande njengoko ebeya kuthanda uyazi ukuba kunokuba buhlungu kangakanani. Aba ngamaqabane angasebenziyo, okuthetha ukuba abakwazi ukuvakalisa iimvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo. Amadoda afumana ubudlelwane babo kunye noxinzelelo lwe-pathological, abantu abanengqondo ngokupheleleyo abakha imiqobo yokuzikhusela kwaye babonakale bebanda kwihlabathi. Banendlela engqongqo kakhulu yobomi kwaye endaweni yokugxila kutyalo-mali ngokweemvakalelo, batyala phantse yonke into emsebenzini nakwizinto eziphathekayo.
Kodwa ngaba ngokwenene abanalo uthando?Ngokutsho kukaMichele Cucchi, ugqirha wengqondo nomalathisi wezonyango weSantagostino Medical Centre eMilan, amadoda angenabubele akanakukwazi kwaphela ukuziva nothando, kodwa yindlela akwenza ngayo oko. kudala ukukhungatheka: «Bathanda ngendlela eyenza abafazi bazive bengaphulaphuli kwaye baqondwa kancinci, abathi ngenxa yoko babe nomona kunye nobudlova."
Nangona kunjalo, akufuneki sidideke ubunzima bokuyeka ukuhamba ngenxa yokwesaba ukubandezeleka okanye njengembangela yentlungu efunyenwe kwixesha elidlulileyo, kunye nendlela echaphazelekayo kubantu. Kule meko izizathu zinokuba zininzi: «Esinye sezizathu sinokuba yi-narcissism, apho umntu egxininise kuphela kwiimfuno zakhe kwaye kungekhona kwezo zomnye - uchaza uMichele Cucchi - apho kongezwa uxinzelelo olugqithisileyo oludityaniswe nokulindela. iphakame kakhulu nakwisiphithiphithi esigquba ubomi babantu namhlanje. Ngaphakathi kwesibini, ingqiqo yokuphakama kunokukhokelela ekuphatheni umfazi njengongaphantsi kunye nengqalelo encinci."
Kubunzima bokuqhubeka okanye ukushiya ubudlelwane bolu hlobo, kufuneka sazi, nangona kunjalo, ukuba indoda engenaluthando ayinyangeki ngokupheleleyo: "Utshintsho lunokwenzeka ukuba ufumana ukudakumba kobulolo ngokweemvakalelo kunye nemibuzo ngokwakhe - uthi uCucchi - kuphela kule nto. imeko ingaqalwa indlela yotshintsho ethi, nokuba inzima kangakanani, ikhokelele kulonwabo."
Umthombo: vanityfair.it
Loris Endala
