Il jin dadin jima'i, haka nan kuma ambaliyar jikinmu da motsin rai, yana zuwa ne daga sanin jikin mutum da gamsar da bukatun mutum da sha’awarsa.
Jin daɗin da yake bayyane kuma cikin iyawar kowa, amma ba haka bane; a zahiri, jin daɗin da aka samu daga jima'i ko kuma daga lalata-zina ya zama wa wasu mutane ainihin utopia: wannan shine batun batutuwa alassithymics.
Menene alexithymia?
Takaitaccen tsarin tarihi don sauƙaƙa fahimta da gogewa akan wasu ra'ayi. Ajalin alexithymia Peter Sifneos (1973) ne ya kirkireshi a farkon rabin shekarun 70 don nuna rashin lafiyar dake da alaƙa da wata matsala ta rayuwa, ganowa da sadarwar motsin rai (daga Girkanci Alpha = rashi, lexis = harshe, thymus = motsin rai, watau "rashin kalmomin don motsin rai").
Ginin an haɓaka shi ne tun daga lura da marasa lafiya tare da "cututtukan" cututtukan kwakwalwa na yau da kullun kuma shekaru da yawa ana ɗauka kusan kusan daidai da su tunda ana tunanin yana da alaƙa musamman da cututtukan kwakwalwa. Daga cikin sifofin asibiti na marasa lafiya masu tabin hankali, Sifneos sun haɗa da:
- wahalar da aka nuna wajen bayanin motsin rai da sanin su;
- raguwar ayyukan tunani wanda ke hade da rudu;
- damuwar da aka nuna tare da cikakkun bayanai game da yanayin waje da na jikin mutum;
- salon tunani mai daskarewa akan abubuwan motsa jiki kuma ya kasa cigaba da bayani (Taylor, 1977; 1984).
Alexithymia saboda haka ya ƙunshi ɗaya dysregulation na motsin zuciyarmu wanda ya shafi cikin mutum rashin iyawa ko wahala don ganowa da sadar da motsin zuciyar su da haɗuwa da ta wasu.
Wannan yanayin yana shafar sadarwa da dangantaka da wasu, yana samar da ɗaya katsewa wanda ke shafar jiki, motsin rai da kusanci. Muna magana ne game da wahalar da cewa kafin tashin hankali yanayi ne mai tasiri da motsin rai. Daga cikin bangarorin daban-daban na wannan yanayin, na yi niyyar in mai da hankali sosai kan wannan gaban na ƙarshe.
Ciwon saƙo mai ratsa jiki da tasiri wanda ke haifar da jerin jerin alamun cututtukan kwakwalwa, wanda ke sake bayyana da yanayin jima'i na mutum.
Wadannan mutane suna nuna rashin kulawa, sanyi kuma basu da sha'awar jima'i yayin da a zahiri basu iya sanin ƙarancin hankali a matakin jiki ba.
"Alexithymia yana wakiltar yankewa tsakanin jiki da ruhi wanda ke lalata kwarewar mutum kuma yana sa mutum ya kasa rayuwa cikin nutsuwa da tunanin mutum".
Maganar alexithymic, tunda ya kasa fahimtar menene sha'awar sa kuma ya more abubuwan da yake so, baya samun ni'ima daga jima'i sabili da haka ya ƙi shi ko saukar da shi zuwa aiki mai sauƙin aiki.
Alexithymics sun ba da rahoton cewa yayin yin jima'i, maimakon mayar da hankali ga ƙwarewa da abubuwan da ke tattare da motsin rai wanda hakan ya ƙunsa, sai su zama baƙi kuma suna tunanin wani abu dabam. Wannan yana hana mutum yin bayani dalla-dalla game da yanayin kwarewar kuma saboda haka ya sanya ba zai yiwu a sami jin daɗi daga motsawar jima'i kanta ba. Idan har ba a iya fahimtar abin da ya shafi jima'i ba ko kuma ba a san shi a matsayin tushen jin daɗi ba, to ba a nema.
Duk wani motsin rai zuwa ga kansa da ɗayan an tunkuɗe shi tun begen jin dadi baya nan kuma komai yana nan akan aikin. Wannan, tare da kusan babu hoton batsa mai lalata, yana hana amsawar jima'i, don haka yana son kafa jerin abubuwan lalata kamar saurin inzali e jinkiri, erectile tabarbarewa, rashin lafiya, anorgasmia.
Ta yaya duk wannan ya shafi ma'aurata?
Wannan rikicewar yana da tasiri mai tasiri akan ma'aurata sosai har ma batun alexithymic ya isa wurin shawarwarin ba da ra'ayin kansa ba, amma saboda abokin hulɗa ya jawo shi ta hanyar rashin yiwuwar musayar motsin rai da rashin rabawa. Tacin yarda da ƙin yarda wanda ya motsa ji na rashin ƙarfi, karaya e rabbi: daga wannan yana samun ci gaba mai nisa daga matsayin jima'i na miji / mata ko mazaunin juna kuma a madadinsa na Mai ba da Kulawa, wanda alexithmic ya dogara sosai, yana yin hanyarsa. A cikin labarai na gaba zan yi magana game da ƙarin fannoni na wannan yanayin mai ban sha'awa da ban mamaki.
