Ukuhlelwa kabusha, indlela yokuzivikela esizikhohlisa ngayo

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ukulungiswa

Ukuhlelwa kabusha kuyindlela yokuzivikela okungekho ophunyukayo. Lapho izinto zingahambi kahle futhi sizizwa sigaxekile, singazizwa sikhungathekile ngakho-ke asikwazi ukubhekana nezimo ngokoqobo. Lapho sihlangabezana nezimo ezisongela kakhulu u- "I" wethu, sithambekele ekuzivikeleni ukugcina ukulinganisela okuthile kwengqondo okusivumela ukuthi siqhubekele phambili ngomonakalo omncane ongaba khona ku-ego yethu. Ukuhlelelwa mhlawumbe kungukuthi indlela yokuzivikela okusakazeke kakhulu.


Kuyini ukuhleleka kokusebenza kwengqondo?

Umqondo wokuhlenga ubuyela emuva ku-psychoanalyst Ernest Jones. Ngo-1908 waphakamisa incazelo yokuqala yokuhlenga: "Ukusungulwa kwesizathu sokuchaza isimo noma isenzo isenzo saso esingaziwa". USigmund Freud washeshe wamukela umqondo wokuhleleka ukuze enze umqondo wezincazelo ezinikezwa iziguli ngezimpawu zazo zemizwa.

Ngokuyisisekelo, ukuhlengahlengiswa kuyindlela yokwenqaba esivumela ukuthi sigweme ukungqubuzana nokukhungatheka okukudalayo. Isebenza kanjani? Sibheka izizathu - ezibonakala zinengqondo - ukwenza izizathu noma ukufihla amaphutha, ubuthakathaka noma ukuphikisana esingafuni ukukwamukela noma esingazi ukuthi kufanele sikwenze kanjani.

Ngokwenzayo, ukuhlengahlengiswa kuyindlela yokwenqaba esivumela ukuthi sibhekane nezingxabano ezingokomzwelo noma izimo zangaphakathi nezangaphandle ezicindezelayo ngokusungula izincazelo eziqinisekisayo kepha ezingalungile ngemicabango yethu, izenzo noma imizwa yabanye abantu ukuze kufihlwe izisusa zangempela.

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Indlela yokwenza izaba, ibhajwe yilokho esingafuni ukukuqaphela

Ngomqondo ojwayelekile, sisebenzisa ukuqonda ukuze sizame ukuchaza nokucacisa isimilo sethu noma okwenzeke kithina ngendlela ebonakalayo noma enengqondo, ukuze lawo maqiniso abekezeleleke noma abe mahle.

Ukuhlelwa kabusha kwenzeka ngezigaba ezimbili. Ekuqaleni senza isinqumo noma sisebenzisa indlela yokuziphatha eshukunyiswa yisizathu esithile. Ngomzuzwana wesibili sakha esinye isizathu, esimbozwe ngomqondo obonakalayo nobumbano, ukufakazela isinqumo noma indlela esiziphatha ngayo, kithina nakwabanye.

Kuyaphawuleka ukuthi ukuzilinganisa akusho ukuthi ukuqamba amanga - okungenani ngomqondo oqinile wegama - njengoba kaningi umuntu egcina ekholwa ngezizathu ezakhiwe. Umshini wokuhlengahlengiswa ulandela izindlela ezisuka ekwazini kwethu; okusho ukuthi, asizikhohlisi ngokwethu noma abanye.

Eqinisweni, lapho isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo sizama ukudalula lezi zizathu, kujwayelekile ukuthi umuntu aziphike ngoba uqinisekile ukuthi izizathu zakhe zisebenza. Asikwazi ukukhohlwa ukuthi ukwenza izisekelo kusekelwe encazelweni, yize ingemanga, inengqondo. Njengoba izimpikiswano esiziphakamisayo zinengqondo ngokuphelele, ziyakwazi ukusikholisa ngakho-ke asidingi ukubona ukwehluleka kwethu, iphutha, ukulinganiselwa noma ukungapheleli kwethu.

Ukuhlelwa kabusha kusebenza njengendlela yokuhlukanisa. Ngaphandle kokuqaphela, sakha ibanga phakathi "kokuhle" nokubi ", sizibiza" okuhle "futhi senqabe" okubi ", ukuqeda umthombo wokungavikeleki, ingozi noma ukungezwani okungokomzwelo esingafuni qaphela. Ngale ndlela siyakwazi "ukuzivumelanisa" nemvelo, noma singazixazululi ngempela izingxabano zethu. Sigcina ukuzazisa kwethu esikhathini esifushane, kepha asikuvikeli unomphela.

Ososayensi be-Neuroscientist e-University of California bathole ukuthi inqubo yokuhleleka ingasebenza ngokushesha lapho kufanele sithathe izinqumo ezinzima noma sibhekene nezingxabano eziphikisanayo, ngaphandle kokucabanga okude, njengomkhiqizo wokuthatha izinqumo ukudambisa ukukhathazeka., Ukukhathazeka kwengqondo kanye nokuqonda dissonance enqunywa inqubo yokwenza izinqumo uqobo.

Ngakho-ke, asihlali sazi ngokuhlenga. Noma kunjalo, lokhu kunqatshelwa kuzoba kukhulu noma kuncane futhi kuhlale isikhathi eside kuncike ekutheni sibona kangakanani iqiniso elisongela kakhulu noma elincane ku "Mina" wethu.

Izibonelo zokuhlenga izinto njengendlela yokuzivikela empilweni yansuku zonke

Ukuhlelwa kabusha kuyindlela yokuzivikela esingayisebenzisa ngaphandle kokuyibona empilweni yansuku zonke. Mhlawumbe isibonelo sokuqala sokwenza izisekelo sivela endabeni ka-Aesop ethi "The Fox and the Grapes".

Kulenganekwane, impungushe ibona amaqoqo bese izama ukufinyelela kuyo. Kepha ngemuva kwemizamo ehlulekile eminingana, uyabona ukuthi iphakeme kakhulu. Ngakho uyabadelela ethi: "Abavuthiwe!".

Empilweni yangempela siziphatha njengempungushe yomlando singanakile. Ukuhlelwa kabusha, empeleni, kwenza imisebenzi ehlukahlukene yokusebenza kwengqondo:

• Gwema ukudumazeka. Singasebenzisa ukulinganisa ukuze sigweme ukudumazeka ngamakhono ethu nokuvikela isithombe esihle esinaso ngathi. Isibonelo, uma ukuxoxwa komsebenzi kungahambi kahle, singazikhohlisa ngokuzitshela ukuthi besingawufuni ngempela lowo msebenzi.

• Ungakuboni ukulinganiselwa. Ukwenza ngokwezifiso kusisindisa ekuboneni eminye yemikhawulo yethu, ikakhulukazi leyo esenza singakhululeki. Uma siya emcimbini, singasho ukuthi asidansi ngoba asifuni ukujuluka, kanti iqiniso wukuthi sinamahloni ngokudansa.

• Ukuphepha ukuba necala. Sijwayele ukusebenzisa inqubo yokuhlelela ukufihla amaphutha ethu futhi sivimbele umuzwa wecala. Singazitshela ukuthi inkinga esasikhathazayo isazovela noma sicabange ukuthi iphrojekthi ibizobhujiswa kwasekuqaleni.

Gwema ukuzazisa. Ukuhlelwa kabusha kwecebo nakho kuyisu lokungazicubunguli ngokwethu, imvamisa ngenxa yokwesaba esingakuthola. Isibonelo, singathethelela isimo sethu esibi noma ukuziphatha kwethu okukhohlisayo ngengcindezi esibe nayo esiminyaminyeni sezimoto lapho empeleni lezi zimo zengqondo zingafihla ukungqubuzana okufihliwe nalowo muntu.

• Ungavumi iqiniso. Lapho iqiniso lidlula amandla ethu okubhekana nalo, sisebenzisa ukuqonda njengezindlela zokuzivikela ukuze zisivikele. Umuntu osebudlelwaneni obuhlukumezayo, ngokwesibonelo, angacabanga ukuthi kuyiphutha lakhe ukungaboni ukuthi umlingani wakhe uyamhlukumeza noma ukuthi akamthandi.

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Ukulinganisela kuba yinkinga nini?

Ukuhlelwa kabusha kungaguquguquka njengoba kusivikela emizwelweni nasezikhuthazweni ebesingeke sikwazi ukubhekana nazo ngaleso sikhathi. Sonke singasebenzisa izindlela ezithile zokuzivikela ngaphandle kokuziphatha kwethu kubhekwe njenge-pathological. Okwenza ukuhleleka kube yinkinga ngempela ukuqina okuzibonakalisa ngakho nokwandiswa kwayo isikhathi eside ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.

UKristin Laurin, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo e-University of Waterloo, empeleni wenze uchungechunge lwezivivinyo ezithakazelisa kakhulu lapho akhombisa khona ukuthi ukucabanga okunengqondo kuvame ukusetshenziswa lapho kukholakala ukuthi izinkinga azinaso isixazululo. Ngokuyisisekelo, uhlobo lokuzinikela ngoba sicabanga ukuthi akunangqondo ukuqhubeka nokulwa.

Kokunye kokuhlolwa, ababambiqhaza bafunda ukuthi ukunciphisa imingcele yejubane emadolobheni kungenza abantu baphephe nokuthi abomthetho banqume ukubanciphisa. Abanye balaba bantu batshelwe ukuthi umthetho omusha wezimoto uzoqala ukusebenza, kanti abanye batshelwa ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi lo mthetho uzonqatshwa.

Labo abakholelwa ukuthi umkhawulo wejubane uzokwehliswa bathande kakhulu ushintsho futhi babheka izizathu ezizwakalayo zokwamukela lokho kuhlinzekwa okusha kunalabo ababecabanga ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi imikhawulo emisha ngeke ivunyelwe. Lokhu kusho ukuthi ukuhleleka kungasisiza ukuthi sibhekane neqiniso esingenakukuguqula.

Kodwa-ke, izingozi zokusebenzisa izaba njengendlela ejwayelekile yokubhekana nezinkinga ngokuvamile zidlula kude izinzuzo ezingaletha kithi:

• Sifihla imizwa yethu. Ukucindezela imizwa yethu kungaba nemiphumela emibi yesikhathi eside. Imizwelo ikhona ukukhombisa ukungqubuzana okudingeka sikuxazulule. Ukungazinaki ngokuvamile akuyixazululi inkinga, kepha kungenzeka kugcine kubhalwe, kusilimaze kakhulu futhi kuqhubekise isimo se-maladaptive esibakhiqizayo.

• Siyenqaba ukubona izithunzi zethu. Uma sisebenzisa ukuhlenga izinto njengendlela yokuzivikela singazizwa kahle ngoba sivikela isithombe sethu, kepha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ukungabuqapheli ubuthakathaka bethu, amaphutha noma ukungapheleli kwethu kuzosivimbela ekukhuleni njengabantu. Singathuthuka kuphela uma sinesithombe esingokoqobo ngathi futhi sazi izimfanelo esizidingayo ukuqinisa noma ukuzicwenga.

• Sisuka eqinisweni. Yize izizathu esizifunayo zingabonakala, kepha uma zingelona iqiniso ngoba zisekelwe kumqondo oyiphutha, imiphumela yesikhathi eside ingaba mibi kakhulu. Ukulungiswa kwemvelo kaningi akusikho ukuguquguquka ngoba kusidedisela kude nokuqhamuka kokungokoqobo, ngendlela esivimbela ukuthi sikwamukele futhi sisebenzele ukukuguqula, kusebenza kuphela ukwandisa isikhathi sokunganeliseki.

Izinkinobho zokuyeka ukusebenzisa ukuhleleka njengendlela yokuvikela

Lapho sizikhohlisa, asigcini nje ngokushaya indiva imizwa yethu nezisusa zethu, kodwa futhi sifihla imininingwane ebalulekile. Ngaphandle kwalolu lwazi, kunzima ukuthatha izinqumo ezinhle. Kunjengokungathi sihamba impilo ivalwe amehlo. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma sikwazi ukwazisa isithombe esiphelele ngendlela ecacile, enengqondo futhi ehlukanisiwe, noma kungaba nzima kangakanani, sizokwazi ukuhlola ukuthi yiliphi isu elingcono kakhulu okufanele sililandele, lelo elingasilimazi kakhulu futhi lokhu, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kusiletha izinzuzo ezinkulu.

Kungakho kubalulekile ukuthi sifunde ukubona imizwa yethu, imizwa yethu nezisusa zethu. Kunombuzo ongasiyisa kude kakhulu: "kungani?" Lapho okuthile kusihlupha noma kusenza singakhululeki, kufanele sizibuze ukuthi kungani.

Kubalulekile ukuthi ungazinikeli ngempendulo yokuqala efika engqondweni ngoba kungenzeka kube yinto enengqondo, ikakhulukazi uma kuyisimo esisikhathaza kakhulu. Kumele siqhubeke nokuphenya izinhloso zethu, sizibuze ukuthi kungani size sifinyelele leyo ncazelo edala ukuzwelana okukhulu ngokomzwelo. Le nqubo yokuzihlola izokhokha futhi isisize sazane kangcono futhi sizamukele njengoba sinjalo, ngakho-ke kuzofanele sisebenzise kancane kancane ekuhleleni.

Imithombo      

Veit, W. et. I-Al. (2019) Isizathu Sokwenza Rationalization. I-Scientific Beenness and Brain Sciences; 43.

I-Laurin, K. (2018) Ukuvula Ukulinganiswa: Izifundo Zezinkambu Ezintathu Zithola Ukwanda Kokulinganisa Uma Izinto Ezilindelwe Ziba Zamanje. Psychol Sci; 29 (4): 483-495.

UKnoll, M. et. Al. (2016) Rationalization (Defense Mechanism) En: Zeigler-Hill V., Shackelford T. (eds) I-Encyclopedia of Personality kanye nokwehluka komuntu ngamunye. I-Springer, i-Cham.

ULaurin, K. et. I-Al. (2012) Reactance Versus Rationalization: Izimpendulo Ezihlukile Ezinqubomgomo Ezivimba Inkululeko. Psychol Sci; 23 (2): 205-209.

UJarcho, JM et. I-Al. (2011) Isisekelo se-neural sokuhlengahlengiswa: ukunciphisa ukuqonda kwe-dissonance ngesikhathi sokuthatha izinqumo. I-Soc Cogn ithinta i-Neurosci; 6 (4): 460-467.

Umnyango Ukuhlelwa kabusha, indlela yokuzivikela esizikhohlisa ngayo yashicilelwa okokuqala ngo Ikhona lePsychology.

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