Kodi chofunika kwambiri pa moyo wanu n’chiyani?
Kodi ndi chiyani chomwe chimapangitsa kukhalapo kwanu kukhala ndi tanthauzo?
Mukakhala ndi yankho, dzifunseni kuti ndi nthawi yochuluka bwanji yomwe mwakhala miyezi ingapo yapitayi pazinthu zomwe zili zofunika kwambiri kwa inu. Mungadabwe kupeza kuti chinthu chofunika kwambiri m’moyo mwanu sichofunika kwambiri, kapena simumathera nthaŵi yokwanira pa icho.
Mutha kupeza kuti mwakodwa mumsasa wantchito ndi maudindo, kuti tsiku lililonse mumachita zomwe muyenera kuchita osati zomwe mukufuna kapena zomwe mukufuna. Mungapezenso kuti mtima wanu umanena chinthu china, koma maganizo anu amanena china.
Kusasinthasintha kumeneku pakati pa zomwe mukumva ndi zomwe mukufuna ndi zomwe mumachita kumabweretsa kusakhutira, kukhumudwa ndi chisoni. Kumva kugawanika ndi kuzindikira kuti zilakolako ndi malingaliro amapita njira imodzi pamene makhalidwe ndi zizolowezi zimapita kwina kumabweretsa mkangano waukulu wamkati.
Moyo wodzaza ndi kudzipereka ndi kudzipereka si njira yabwino yopangira maudindo osiyanasiyana omwe mumatenga. Mwanjira imeneyi, mukakhala kuntchito, mudzadziona kukhala wolakwa chifukwa chosakhala ndi nthaŵi yokwanira ndi banja lanu, koma mukakhala panyumba, mudzada nkhaŵa poyembekezera ntchito. Kotero malingaliro anu adzakhala kwina kulikonse. Simudzakhalapo kwathunthu. Ndipo musanadziwe, moyo udzatha.
Kuti muthetse kusagwirizanaku, muyenera kukulitsa umphumphu wamalingaliro.
Kodi umphumphu wamalingaliro ndi chiyani?
Mukazindikira kwambiri zakukhosi kwanu, m'pamenenso mumatha kuwongolera malingaliro anu mwanzeru komanso molimba mtima. Choncho, mudzakhala okhutira kwambiri ndi moyo umene mukukhala, zomwe zidzakulitsa umoyo wanu wamaganizo. Komabe, kuti mukwaniritse izi, chinthu chimodzi chofunikira ndi chofunikira: kukhulupirika m'malingaliro.
Lingaliro la kukhulupirika m'malingaliro limatanthawuza kulimba mtima kuzindikira malingaliro athu enieni ndi zilakolako zathu popanda kuwaweruza kudzera m'magulu a anthu. Kwenikweni, zikutanthauza kukhala woona mtima kotheratu kwa inu nokha povomereza malingaliro athu, zikhumbo ndi maloto athu.
Kuwona mtima kumatanthawuzanso kukhalabe owona ku mayiko omwe akhudzidwa, kutha kuwafotokozera motsimikiza komanso mosasinthasintha m'moyo wathu watsiku ndi tsiku. Chifukwa chake ndi kuzindikira zomwe timamva - zokondweretsa kapena ayi - ndikukhala okhulupirika kwa izo, mosasamala kanthu za zomwe ena anganene kapena kuganiza.
Tsoka ilo, kukhulupirika m'malingaliro ndi luso losawerengeka komanso losakulitsidwa. Nthawi zonse wokondedwa akatifunsa momwe tilili, mwachitsanzo, ndipo timayankha ndi "zabwino", ngakhale titawonongeka mkati, timasiya kukhulupirika kwathu.
Tikapanda kuyesera kulota kapena kuzindikira zomwe zimatilepheretsa, timakhala opanda ungwiro. Ngakhale titakhala muubwenzi ndi zochitika zomwe zimatipangitsa kukhala osamasuka, chifukwa chakuti tilibe kulimba mtima kuvomereza kuti sizomwe tikufuna, timayiwala za kukhulupirika m'malingaliro.
Kodi munthu wathunthu wamalingaliro ndi wotani?
Anthu omwe akulitsa kukhulupirika kwawo m'malingaliro ali ndi zinthu zofanana:
- Ndiwoona mtima pamalingaliro awo, zokhumba ndi maloto awo, kwa iwo eni komanso ndi ena.
- Sachita manyazi ndi momwe akumvera komanso momwe akumvera, komanso samadandaula kapena kudzudzula ena chifukwa cha zomwe akumva, chifukwa amatenga udindo pazokhudza mayiko awo.
- Amakhala ndi chidwi chodzidzimutsa chomwe chimawalola kumvetsetsa komwe akumvera komanso kuzindikira momwe amayankhira okha.
- Amakumana ndi chowonadi chosasangalatsa kapena chowawa, pozindikira mithunzi yawo, zofooka zawo ndi zofooka zawo.
- Amasamalira zosowa zawo zamaganizidwe ndikuyesera kuwakwaniritsa motsimikiza, osavulaza ena kapena iwo eni.
- Amakonza moyo wawo m'njira yoti zinthu zofunikadi komanso zopatsa chidwi zikhazikike patsogolo.
Momwe mungakulitsire umphumphu wamalingaliro popanda kufa mukuyesera?
Tikukhala m'gulu lomwe limapondereza malingaliro, makamaka omwe amatchedwa "oyipa", kotero ndizomveka kuti anthu ambiri amakhulupirira kuti sangathe "kukwanitsa" kufotokoza zomwe akumva.
Ndipotu kafukufuku amene anachitika ku India anasonyeza kuti anthu amene amakhala m’mizinda sakhala ndi mtima wosagawanika poyerekezera ndi anthu amene amakhala m’madera amene anthu amangokhalira kungokhala. Pachifukwa ichi, sitepe yoyamba pakukulitsa kukhulupirika m'malingaliro ndikudzitalikirana ndi malingaliro okhudzana ndi gawo lokhudzidwa ndikusiya kugawa. zotengeka ndi zomverera monga "zoyipa" kapena "zabwino".
Robert Solomon ananena kuti kukhulupirika m’maganizo kumaphatikizapo kukhala ndi moyo mokwanira, wamitundumitundu. Kwa wanthanthi uyu, moyo uli ndi kufiyira kwa mkwiyo ndi chikasu cha chisangalalo, buluu wa mphindi zachisangalalo ndi zobiriwira zonyansa. Moyo wofunika kukhala ndi moyo ndi wokongola, zomwe sizikutanthauza kungodziwa komanso kuvomereza kutengeka kwamitundu yosiyanasiyana, komanso mithunzi yosiyana siyana komanso mphamvu zosiyanasiyana. Solomo ankakhulupirira kuti moyo wosiyana kwambiri ndi kukhulupirika m’maganizo ndi wotopetsa.
Tiyenera kuzindikira kuti ngati tidziimba mlandu chifukwa cha mmene tikumvera, tidzakhala ndi chizolowezi chobisa maganizowo, ngakhale kwa ife eni, kutilepheretsa kukhala oona mtima. M’mbuto mwace, tisafunika kupfundza kutawirisa pinafuna ife na pinafuna ife, mwakukhonda tsalakana. Mkhalidwe wotseguka umenewo ndiwo mzati umene kukhulupirika m’maganizo kumangidwirapo.
Zoonadi, gawo ili lingakhale lopweteka chifukwa limakhudza kupeza mithunzi yamkati, mbali za ife tokha zomwe tinazibisa mosavuta chifukwa chakuti anthu sakuziganizira. Panthawiyi mungapeze, mwachitsanzo, kuti momwe mudakhazikitsira moyo wanu umakwaniritsa miyezo ya chikhalidwe cha anthu ndikupangitsa ena kukhala osangalala, koma sikukwaniritsa zokhumba zanu zakuya ndi zokhumba zanu kapena kukupatsani chisangalalo.
Pambuyo pake tidzadzifunsa mafunso ovuta omwe amatilola kukayikira moyo wathu. Ingokumbukirani kuti palibe mayankho olondola kapena olakwika. Ndi za kulumikizana ndi zomwe mukumva komanso zomwe mukufuna, gawo lomwe mwakhala chete kwa nthawi yayitali. Zindikirani zosowa zanu, zokhumba zanu, zoyendetsa ndi zokhumba zanu popanda kuweruza kapena kudziimba mlandu. Kuwona mtima koteroko kudzakhala maziko olimba opangira zisankho zabwinoko kuti mudziwe bwino zolinga zanu ndi machitidwe anu.
Pomaliza, tiyenera kugwiritsa ntchito umphumphu wamalingaliro pa moyo wathu watsiku ndi tsiku mwa kuyamba ndi zinthu zazing'ono. Ngati mnzanu wapamtima akufunsani mmene mulili, mwachitsanzo, yankhani moona mtima. Ndizowona kuti kukhulupirika m'malingaliro kumawonetsa kusatetezeka kwanu, koma musaiwale kuti kumathandizanso kupanga mgwirizano wamphamvu wamalingaliro.
Kugwiritsa ntchito kukhulupirika m'malingaliro kumaphatikizanso kuganiziranso zabizinesi yanu yatsiku ndi tsiku kuti mupeze malo pazinthu zomwe zili zofunika kwambiri kwa inu ndikukupatsani chikhutiro chenicheni, chifukwa zimagwirizana ndi maloto anu ndi zokhumba zanu. Lembani mndandanda wa zomwe mukufunadi.
Tangoganizirani moyo womwe mukufuna kukhala nawo, ganizirani zomwe mukufuna kuti mukwaniritse ndikuwona zotsatira za zomwe mukufuna. Chifukwa chake, gwiritsani ntchito uinjiniya wakumbuyo kuti mupange zisankho zomwe zimakuthandizani kukhala ndi moyo womwe mukufuna, m'malo mongopereka maloto anu, malingaliro anu ndi chinyengo paguwa lantchito.
Malire:
Kumari, R. (2018) Kuyerekeza Kuphunzira kwa Kuyamikira kwa Anthu Kukhoza, Social Emotional Integrity of Rural Area and Urban Area Working Women of Himachal Pradesh. International Journal of Management ndi Applied Science; 4 (2): 80-83.
Solomon, R. (2007) Ética emocional. Chiphunzitso cha kumverera. Barcelona: Paidós Ibérica.
Pakhomo Kodi umphumphu wamalingaliro ndi chiyani? Lingaliro lomwe lingasinthe moyo wanu idasindikizidwa koyamba mu Pakona ya Psychology.
