Sinthani zakukhalapo kwanu ndi Gulu la Gulu. Ndi chiyani?
Magulu a mabanja ndi njira yothandizirana yomwe cholinga chake ndikutulutsa ndi kusungunula zotchinga ndi zamphamvu zomwe zimabisala chikomokere. Mabuloko omwe tidatengera mosadziwa kuchokera kubanja lathu kuphatikiza makolo.
Izi zimakhazikika m'moyo mwa kulepheretsa mobwerezabwereza komanso mobwerezabwereza, kufunitsitsa kukhala osangalala kwathunthu, kukhala ndi maubwenzi abwino, kapena kukhala olemera ngakhale tili odzipereka komanso oyesetsa.
Mitunduyi imafalikira kuchokera ku mibadwomibadwo ndipo imatha kukhala yoyambitsa matenda, zovuta, zovuta zamatsenga ndi zakuthupi.
Pali maphunziro ambiri omwe adachitidwa pankhaniyi kutsatira malingaliro a wama psychologist waku Germany Bert Hellinger.
Hellinger patatha zaka zambiri akuphunzira, adazindikira kuti munthuyo, kuti athe kuzindikira ndi "kusungunula" maubwenzi omwe ena angatchule kuti karmic, sayenera kuwonedwa ngati chinthu chokha: m'malo mwake adayikidwapo maubale., zomwe zimabweretsa kuzindikira maubwenzi kapena "zovuta zosathetsedwa" kwa mamembala, ngakhale atakhala kuti sakukumbukiridwa kapena sanadziwikebe.
Zodabwitsazi zimachitika chifukwa cha chikumbukiro "chopanda chidziwitso" chomwe chimafalikira kuchokera ku mibadwomibadwo, ndipo zomwe mwanjira zina zimakhudza zisankho zathu, maubale, komanso moyo wathu wonse.
Timadzipeza tokha ndikukhala monga momwe tawonera kale mufilimu, masiku amoyo wathu omwe amatsatizana, momwe "maphunziro ndi mbiri yakale" zikuwoneka kuti zikuchitika, zomwe zimakhudza magawo onse amoyo wathu, omwe akuwoneka kuti ndi zochitika zojambula kale zidakhalako kale, kapena ngakhale zidakhalako ndi makolo athu.
Zili ngati kuti tafika padziko lapansi kale ndi ntchito yomwe tikufuna kukwaniritsa.
Monga tafotokozera kale izi zimawonekera m'njira zosiyanasiyana kwambiri komanso pazinthu zina m'moyo wathu, kwa wina yemwe ali pamavuto akusangalala ndi moyo wachuma wokhutira, ngakhale kuyesayesa mobwerezabwereza komwe posachedwa kumabweretsa zokhumudwitsa ndikutaya kudzidalira komanso mphamvu, chifukwa ena chifukwa chokhala ndi thanzi labwino, chikondi, mavuto amisala, ena pakupitilira "kumapeto" ndikusankha, molakwika, njira yolakwika.
Pali zina zomwe zimapangitsa kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo "wakufa" womwe umakhudza kwambiri njira ya moyo, nthawi zambiri m'njira yolakwika ndikulepheretsa kukwaniritsa zomwe mukufuna.
Zochitika zina posankha zibwenzi zosayenera kapena kukumana kosatha, ndi munthu wina aliyense kuti akalimbikitse chidziwitso, mavuto omwewo pachiyanjano omwe adawonedwa kale m'maubwenzi am'mbuyomu.
Ndi zina zambiri.
Ngati inunso mwakumana ndi zovuta zomwe tafotokozazi pamwambapa kapena zina zomwe sizinafotokozedwe m'moyo wanu, mudzakhala ndi chidwi chodziwa kuti izi sizingakhale zakupha chabe ndipo mwina muyenera kupita kumsonkhano womwe magulu a mabanja akuyimilidwa.
Kugwiritsa ntchito njirayi kumachitika ndi anthu masauzande ambiri padziko lonse lapansi, omwe adakumana nawo, atangofufuza gulu lawo la mabanja, kumverera "kumasulidwa".
Monga zitsanzo pansipa:
- Mavuto omwe akhala akukumana nawo pantchito yanu kapena ndalama amakwaniritsidwa
- Njira zenizeni zodzichiritsira zimayamba
- Mumayamba kukhala ndi moyo wokwanira komanso wokhutiritsa
- Zochitika zabwino zobwereza zimachitika
Othandizira ambiri padziko lonse lapansi akuti njira iyi pamapeto pake ikuwoneka kuti ikupeza njira zothanirana ndi zomwe akufuna mpaka pano atayesetsa kwanthawi yayitali.
Koma atembenukira kuti?
Pali malo ku Italy omwe amapereka njirayi mwa njira yophunzitsira njirayi, imodzi mwodziwika kwambiri ndi Masatalent Academy komwe mungalumikizane nawo kutenga nawo mbali pamisonkhano yomwe imakonzedwa m'mizinda yaku Italy komanso akunja.
M'maphunziro awa mudzatsogozedwa osati kungopeza lingaliro lomwe limayambira magulu a Hellinger, komanso ziwonetsanso mwachitsanzo momwe gulu la mabanja limachitikira.
Osati zokhazo: mupezanso momwe mungagwirire ntchito moyenda panokha, pagulu lanu labanja, osafunikira kuphatikizira anthu ena: cholinga chake ndi kukhala ndi zida zodziwitsira ndi kuthetsa mfundo zofunika kwambiri zomwe zingalepheretse kuyenda koyenera za moyo wanu kukhala ndi chimwemwe, thanzi ndi thanzi.
NB Magulu a Mabanja, amtundu uliwonse, si ochiritsa amisala kapena samakhudza mitu yaukatswiri kapena mitu yofananira. Sangalowe m'malo mwa madokotala amisala, ma psychotherapists, ma psychoanalysts, a psychiatrists, ndi ena.
Kudzera munjira yamagulu am'banja titha kudziwa zosalungama, kupatula, kusowa komwe makolo athu adakumana nawo omwe kukumbukira kwawo kopweteketsa kukadatifikira ndikusintha moyo wathu.
Mwa kulola mawonekedwe owoneka bwino, titha kumvetsetsa bwino chiyambi cha zomwe tikukumana nazo, ndikuphatikizanso zomwe sizikupezeka m'dongosolo konzani dongosolo.
Pogwiritsa ntchito njira ya Magulu a Banja timagwira ntchito yokonzanso mzere wathu wobadwira ndikudziŵa zowawa zilizonse (imfa, matenda, nkhondo, kusokonekera), kusowa chilungamo, kusalidwa, kusowa ndalama komanso zokumana nazo m'banja, chikhalidwe ndi chikhalidwe: zonsezi zimafalikira kuchokera kwa makolo kupita mbadwa.
Sizikudziwika kuti zonsezi ndi zophweka: nthawi zambiri zomwe zimawonekera pakuyimira magulu a nyenyezi ndizosadziwika konse ndipo sizinachitikepo kwa iwo omwe akukonzekera kukumana ndi matendawo omwe sadziwa kanthu. Ndipo ichi ndiye chizindikiro chokha choti tili panjira yoyenera, mmenemo gulu la nyenyezi silimationetsa kokha zomwe tikudziwa kale za banja lathu (zomwe timazindikira modabwitsa malingaliro ndi machitidwe ena omwe amafotokozedwa ndendende ndi omwe akuyimira); chopereka chenicheni cha gulu la nyenyezi chimakhala ndikutiwulula zomwe sitidziwa za banja lathu, ndikupeza kumeneku komwe kumayambitsa njira yodzichiritsira.
Nkhani ndi Loris Valentine
