Kwa zaka mazana ambiri, kumvera kwakhala kulingaliridwa kukhala khalidwe labwino, chinthu chofunika kwambiri chimene makolo amakhomereza mwa ana awo. M'malo mwake, kusamvera kwatsitsidwa kukhala m'gulu la uchimo kapena kutsutsa mtengo. Lingaliro ili lakhazikika m'maganizo mwathu kotero kuti kusankha kwathu kosasintha nthawi zambiri kumakhala kumvera. Komabe, sitingakhale aufulu weniweni kapena kukhala tokha popanda kusamvera.
Kodi kusamvera ndi chiyani, ndipo sichoncho?
Mawu akuti kumvera amachokera ku Chilatini matenda opatsirana, zomwe zimasonyeza kudziŵa kumvetsera mwatcheru. Tikamayesetsa kumvetsera mwatcheru, timamvetsa ndi kusanthula uthengawo, kotero kuti tizindikire, ndipo koposa zonse, kusankha kaya kutsatira malangizowo kapena ayi. Choncho, kumatanthauza ufulu. Koma m’kupita kwa zaka zambiri tanthauzo loyambirira la mawu oti kumvera lasintha kwambiri moti masiku ano limamveka ngati kukwaniritsidwa kwa chifuniro cha olamulira.
Erich Fromm, psychoanalyst ndi social psychology, amapereka lingaliro lovuta komanso lolemera la kumvera ndi kutsutsa kwake, kusamvera. “Kusamvera, m’lingaliro limene liwulo limagwiritsiridwa ntchito, ndiko kutsimikizira kulingalira ndi kufuna. Sikuti ndi maganizo otsutsana ndi chinachake, koma maganizo pa chinachake, chomwe chimatanthawuza kuti munthu amatha kuona, kufotokoza zomwe akuwona ndikukana zomwe sakuwona ". Choncho, kusamvera sikungakhale kutsutsa mtengo koma, muzochitika zina, kuchitapo kanthu kogwirizana, kuzindikira ndi kutsimikiziranso munthu payekha.
Fromm amaletsanso mgwirizano wolakwika womwe wapangidwa pakati pa kusamvera ndi chiwawa. "Kusamvera, munthu sayenera kukhala waukali kapena wopanduka: malinga ngati maso ake ali otseguka, amakhala maso ndipo akufuna kutenga udindo wotsegula maso a omwe ali pachiopsezo cha kufa chifukwa chomizidwa ndi kugona". Chifukwa chake, kusamvera ndikonso kuchita mwachidwi.
“Sindikutanthauza kuti kusamvera kulikonse ndi khalidwe labwino ndipo kumvera kulikonse ndi khalidwe loipa [...] Munthu amene angathe kumvera kokha, osati kusamvera, ndi kapolo. Kumbali inayi, munthu yekhayo amene angathe kusamvera ndi wopanduka (osati wosintha) yemwe amachita chifukwa cha mkwiyo, kukhumudwa ndi mkwiyo, osati m'dzina la chikhulupiriro kapena mfundo ".
Kwa Fromm, kusamvera sikutanthauza kupanduka kopanda phindu, koma chipatso cha kukhudzika kwakukulu, kuchita mwanzeru komwe kumatilola kuti tidzikhazikitsenso monga anthu ndikuteteza ufulu wathu. Sizimachokera ku kutaya mtima, kukhumudwa kapena kukanidwa kosavuta, koma kuchokera ku chitetezo ndi kudalira kwaumwini. Sichigamulo chotsutsana ndi chinachake - ngakhale chikutanthauza - koma ndi udindo woteteza chinachake.
M’buku lake lakuti “Kusamvera ndi nkhani zina” akufotokozanso chinthu chimodzi chimene, m’malingaliro mwake, chingalungamitse kumvera. Kumvera kumakhala koyenera pamene kumafuna kuvomereza ulamuliro wa munthu wina kapena bungwe mwachidziwitso ndi molingalira bwino chifukwa chakuti zolinga zathu zimayenda m’njira yofanana ndi imene imafuna kumvera, kotero kuti mchitidwe umenewu usakhale kugonjera kwachisawawa koma m’malo mwake ukhale woyenerera kwa onse aŵiriwo.
Kumvera kodziyimira pawokha komanso kosagwirizana, msampha wa chikumbumtima chaulamuliro
Fromm amapita patsogolo posiyanitsa kofunika pakati pa mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya kumvera. Fotokozani zimenezo “Kumvera munthu, bungwe kapena mphamvu (kumvera mopanda malire) kuli kofanana ndi kugonjera; kumatanthauza kuchotseratu ufulu wa munthu ndi kuvomereza chifuniro chakunja kapena chiweruzo m'malo mwa iye mwini ". Uku ndiko kumvera kofala kwambiri masiku ano. Ndi kumvera komwe kumachokera ku umbuli wosonkhezeredwa, ulesi ndi kuchotsa mphamvu zaumwini.
M'malo mwake, “Kumvera maganizo a munthu kapena zikhulupiriro (kumvera kodzilamulira) ndiko kutsimikizira, osati kugonjera. Ngati zikhulupiriro zanga ndi chiweruzo changa zilidi zanga, ziri mbali ya ine. Chifukwa chake, ngati ndiwatsata, m'malo motengera ziweruzo za ena, ndine ndekha ”.
Koma Fromm amatichenjezanso za msampha wa anthu womwe ndi wosavuta kugweramo: kusokoneza kumvera kodziyimira pawokha ndi chikumbumtima chaulamuliro.
Chidziwitso cha Authoritarian ndi liwu lamkati la munthu wolamulira, liwu lomwe timamvera chifukwa timawopa kusokoneza. Kwenikweni, chidziwitso chaulamuliro cha Fromm ndi chofanana ndi lingaliro la Freudian la superego, lomwe limasonkhanitsa zoletsa zonse zomwe zimayikidwa, choyamba ndi makolo ndiyeno ndi anthu, zomwe timavomereza chifukwa choopa chilango ndi kukanidwa.
Mwachionekere, kumvera chikumbumtima chaulamuliro, kukambitsirana kwamkati kumeneko kumene kumatiuza zimene “tiyenera kuchita” pamene tikunyalanyaza zimene tikufuna kapena zimene zingatipangitse kumva bwino, kuli ngati kumvera mphamvu yakunja, ngakhale mphamvuyo italowetsedwa mkati. Chidziwitso chaulamuliro chimenecho kwenikweni ndi kumvera kobisika kobisika komwe kumatisokoneza kuti tikhulupirire kuti timachita zomwe tikufuna, pomwe kwenikweni timamvera machitidwe omwe adayikidwa mwa ife.
Kodi machitidwe athu amachokera kuti ku kumvera?
Tikamamvera chikumbumtima chathu chaulamuliro timagonjera ku zizolowezi, malamulo ndi zikhalidwe zomwe takhazikitsa, osakayikira kutsimikizika kwake komanso kufunika kwake. Kunena zowona, kumvera kolinganizidwa bwino kwambiri pamlingo wa chikhalidwe cha anthu pamene, panthaŵi inayake m’mbiri, kunali kofunika kukulitsa chimvero chamkati choloŵa m’malo chimene chinaikidwa ndi mphamvu ndi mantha.
Poyerekeza kumvera ndi khalidwe labwino, m’pomveka kuti aliyense ankafuna kumvera. Ndi chida ichi m'manja, kwambiri m'mbiri anthu ochepa atha kulamulira ambiri. Komabe, ndi chikumbumtima chaulamuliro sikuti timangotaya mphamvu ya kusamvera, komanso sitidziwa kuti timamvera.
Ndithudi, ichi sindicho chifukwa chokha chimene timakonda kumvera.
Fromm akuwonetsa kuti “Tikamamvera maulamuliro apamwamba, kaya a boma, tchalitchi kapena maganizo a anthu, timakhala otetezeka komanso otetezedwa. Sitingathe kulakwitsa ndipo timadzimasula tokha ku maudindo ”. Kumvera kumatimasula ku thayo la kulamulira moyo wathu, kumapeŵa kuyesetsa kusankha zochita, ndipo koposa zonse, kukhumudwa tikalephera. Ichi ndichifukwa chake nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosavuta kugonjera mphamvu kusiyana ndi kubetcherana pa ufulu wa munthu.
Ndipotu, kumvera kumagwirizana ndi mantha a ufulu ndi zomwe umaphatikizapo. "Munthu akhoza kukhala womasuka kudzera mchitidwe wosamvera mwa kuphunzira kunena kuti 'ayi' ku mphamvu." Koma ngati tikumva chizungulire poyang’anizana ndi ufulu, sitingathe kumvera chifukwa mfundo zonsezi n’zogwirizana kwambiri.
Chikumbumtima chaumunthu ngati njira yotsimikiziranso munthu payekha
Ku chikumbumtima chaulamuliro Fromm amasiyanitsa chikumbumtima chaumunthu. "Ndi mawu omwe amapezeka mwa munthu aliyense, mosasamala kanthu za mphotho ndi zilango zakunja. Chidziwitso chaumunthu chimachokera pa mfundo yakuti tili ndi chidziwitso chodziwika bwino cha zomwe ziri zaumunthu ndi zopanda umunthu, zomwe zimalimbikitsa moyo ndi zomwe zimawononga. Kuzindikira kumeneku ndikofunikira kuti tigwire ntchito ngati anthu ”.
Komabe, "Kumvera chikumbumtima chaulamuliro kumafooketsa chikumbumtima chaumunthu, kuthekera kokhala ndi kudziweruza nokha", Fromm akuti. Choncho, tiyenera kuphunzira kugwirizana ndi ife tokha kupyola misonkhano ya chikhalidwe cha anthu kuti tidzifunse zomwe zili zabwino ndi zomwe siziri, zomwe zili zabwino kwa ife ndi zomwe zimativulaza, zomwe tikufunadi ndi zomwe timadana nazo. Chilumikizocho chikapezeka, timangoyenera kukhala okhulupirika kwa icho, ngakhale zitatanthauza kusamvera malamulo ena.
“Kusamvera munthu kuyenera kukhala olimba mtima kukhala yekha, kulakwitsa ndi kuchimwa. Ngakhale kulimba mtima sikuli kokwanira [...] Ndiwo okhawo omwe adzipanga okha kukhala munthu wokhwima mokwanira ndipo apeza luso loganiza ndi kudzimva paokha akhoza kukhala olimba mtima kunena "ayi" ku mphamvu, kusamvera ", akuwonetsa Fromm.
Chitsime:
Fromm, E. (2001) Pa desobediencia y otros ensayos. Barcelona: Paidós Ibérica
Pakhomo Kusamvera ngati njira yaufulu komanso kutsimikiziranso munthu payekha, malinga ndi Erich Fromm idasindikizidwa koyamba mu Pakona ya Psychology.
