Kudzimva kukhala wokakamira m'moyo ndizochitika zofala. Ambiri aife, nthawi ina, timamva kuti tili m'malo, udindo, ubale, kapena zochitika zomwe sitimasuka nazo. Zoonadi, kudzimva kuti watsekeredwa m’mavuto sikuli kosangalatsa.
Tingathe kuthedwa nzeru kwambiri ndi kulefuka chifukwa chakuti sitingathe kupatsa moyo wathu chilimbikitso chimene tikufuna. Kudzimva kulemedwa kokakamira kumatiukira komwe kumatilimbitsa pomwe tili ndipo kumatilepheretsa kusuntha mbali iliyonse. Kumverera kumeneku kukasungidwa pakapita nthawi, kungayambitse kutaya kwatanthauzo m'moyo ndikupita ku kupsinjika maganizo ndi kusowa chochita.
Chifukwa chenicheni chomwe mumamva kuti mulibe moyo
Zikwi ndi chimodzi zifukwa angaperekedwe kufotokoza kumverera kwa kuyimirira m'moyo. Ena angaganize kuti ali ndi ntchito yotopetsa yomwe siiwapatsa mwayi wogwira ntchito zomwe akufuna, ena paubwenzi womwe wasiya kuwakwaniritsa ndipo wayambitsa mikangano, pomwe ena amadzimva kuti ali pachiwopsezo chambiri kapena chikhalidwe cha anthu. .ndi zokhumudwitsa.
Komabe, zoona zake n’zakuti mukakhala kuti mulibe njira yopulumukira m’moyo, mumakhala ndi ziwalo zosafunidwa zimene nthawi zambiri zimabwera chifukwa chotaya nthawi yochuluka mumkhalidwe umene ulipo umene umaoneka ngati mulibe njira yothetsera vutolo, chifukwa mukayang’ana m’chizimezime mulibe njira yotulukira. Onani chilichonse kusintha kopitilira muyeso.
Kwenikweni, kudzimva kukhala wokakamira kumabwera chifukwa chokhulupirira kuti tiyenera kukhala zomwe sitili. Ndikumverera komwe kumabwera mukaganiza kuti moyo uyenera kukhala wosiyana ndi momwe ulili. Choncho kumverera kwa ziwalo si kanthu kena koma mtunda pakati pa zomwe inu muli ndi zomwe mukufuna kukhala, pakati pa zomwe zimachitika ndi zomwe mukufuna kuti zichitike. M’lingaliro lina, kudzimva kuti watsekeredwa m’ndende nthaŵi zonse kumasonyeza kusakhutira kwakukulu ndi chimene ife tiri kapena kumene ife tiri, pamene sitingathe kuwona njira yotulukira kuti tikafike pa mkhalidwe wabwino.
Pambuyo pa miyezi yambiri ya mliri ndi kunyada, si zachilendo kuti kumverera kwachisangalalo kukhalebe m'chilengedwe ndipo anthu ambiri amamva kuti sanathe kupita patsogolo, kukumana ndi zinthu zatsopano, kupeza malo atsopano kapena ngakhale kusangalala. Chizoloŵezi ndi malo omwe kumverera kwa stagnation kumakula.
Kumbali ina, moyo umene timakhala nawo ukhozanso kukulitsa malingaliro a kulumala. Monga momwe wafilosofi Byung-Chul Han akunena, ndi gulu la kutopa zimatitsogolera ku kudziwonongera tokha, zomwe zimapanga chikhalidwe cha kutopa kwamuyaya komwe kumapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuti tiwonetse chidwi chathu chofunikira ndikuyang'ana chinthu chatanthauzo chomwe chimatikhutiritsa ndi kutilozera njira yoposa ntchito ndi maudindo a anthu.
Kodi muyenera kuchita chiyani mukakhala kuti mulibe moyo?
1. Dziperekeni ku kumverera kwakufa ziwalo
Ngati mukumva kukhala wokakamira, vomerezani ndikuvomereza kumverera uku. Choyipa kwambiri chomwe mungachite ndikugwidwa ndi intaneti ya "zoyenera" kapena "zoyenera". Ngati mupumula ndikudzipereka ku malingaliro amenewo, mudzalowa nthawi yabata pomwe zinthu zidzayamba kuyenda.
Zindikirani malingaliro ndi malingaliro omwe mumamva mukakhala otsekeredwa kapena mukuwona kuti china chake chalakwika. Ngati muvomereza kumverera kumeneko, sikungakutsekereni. Muyenera kumvetsetsa kuti ichi ndi chizindikiro chomwe mudayikapo mphindi m'moyo wanu chomwe sichinakwaniritse zomwe mukuyembekezera.
Kuvomereza kuti mwatsekeredwa sikungapangitse kuti malingaliro osasangalatsawo achoke, koma sangakulepheretseni mpaka kuwononga moyo wanu. Chochititsa chidwi ndichakuti mukavomera kutsekeredwa, chozizwitsa chimachitika: mudzasiya kutsekeredwa chifukwa mwatuluka mugulu loyipa lomwe mudali.
2. Khalani okonzeka kupanga zisankho
"Misala nthawi zonse imachita zomwezo ndikuyembekezera zotsatira zosiyana nthawi zonse", Albert Einstein adati. Izi zikutanthauza kuti ngati mukufuna kuchoka pachimake, muyenera kuchita zosiyana kuti mupange kusintha komwe mukufuna. Ngati mutsatira chizoloŵezicho, kumverera kwakufa ziwalo sikudzatha kokha.
N’zoona kuti kusankha zochita n’kovuta. Ngati muli olumala, mwina ndi chifukwa chakuti munatengeka ndi zochitika popanda kupanga zisankho. Munatengeka ndi kuyenda kwa zochitika chifukwa inali yankho losavuta. Koma kuti mutuluke munjira imeneyi muyenera kudzifunsa kuti: Kodi chikukuvutitsani ndi chiyani? Ndi chiyani chomwe sichimakukhutiritsani? Kodi ndi zinthu ziti zimene zachititsa kuti anthu asakhale osangalala? Kodi n’koyenera kuti mwakhutira ndi zimene zikuchitikazi?
Kenako, tenga njira yosinthira. Kodi mungatani kuti mutulukemo? Ganizirani mmene zinthu zilili pa moyo wanu ndipo ganizirani zimene mungachite kuti musiye kukhumudwa kumene mukukumana nako. Kupatula pazovuta kwambiri, china chake chikhoza kuchitika nthawi zonse. Kodi chingakulimbikitseni chiyani? Kodi n’chiyani chingakusangalatseni? Nchiyani chingakupangitseni kumva ngati mukupita patsogolo m'moyo?
Chinsinsi ndicho kupanga zisankho zazing'ono zomwe zimakufikitsani pomwe mukufuna. Simungathe kuchoka pano kupita kumalo omwe mukufuna m'kuphethira kwa diso. Osataya mtima, ingochitani zinthu zing'onozing'ono zomwe zimakutulutsani m'malingaliro anu apano ndikukufikitsani kufupi ndi zomwe mukufuna.
3. Landirani modzidzimutsa ndi kusangalala
Erich Fromm ankaganiza kuti kuchita zinthu mwachisawawa ndi chithunzithunzi cha mphamvu ya moyo, imene imapangidwa kuyenda momasuka. Pamene kutuluka kwatsekedwa, kawirikawiri chifukwa chakuti timayesa kugwirizana ndi anthu ndikukwaniritsa zoyembekeza za ena, timasiya kuyankha zofuna zathu, timadzipatula tokha, ndipo mtunda umapangidwa pakati pa zomwe tikufuna ndi zomwe timachita.
M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, pamene mtunda ukukula, timataya mwachisawawa ndi kuthekera kosangalala. Kenako timamva ngati takanidwa. Pachifukwa ichi, imodzi mwa njira zopezeranso chifuno chokhala ndi moyo ndikudzidzidzimutsa nokha mukuyenda kofunikira ndikupeza modzidzimutsa.
Mukafuna kuchita chinachake, chitani! Lumikizanani ndi zikhumbo zanu zamkati ndikuwapatsa mwayi woti afotokoze zakukhosi kwawo. Ngati mukumva ngati kuvina, kulemba, kujambula, kuyenda ... yambani kuchita popanda kudzifunsa chifukwa chake. Kunena zowona, sitiyenera kuyang’ana zifukwa zilizonse zodzikhululukira kapena kusangalala ndi moyo.
Zochita zongochitika zokha komanso zopanga zilibe cholinga china koma kutipangitsa kumva bwino. Nthawi zambiri sakhala ndi cholinga, koma ndi mathero mwa iwo okha. Zoona zake n’zakuti, nthawi zonse pali chinachake choti muchite mukamakakamira chifukwa mbali zonse za moyo wanu sizimapuwala kotheratu. Kukankhira pang'ono m'dera limodzi kumatha kupanga chipale chofewa chomwe chimakhudza magawo ena onse ndikukubwezeretsaninso.
Mulimonse momwe zingakhalire, kumbukirani kuti kukhumudwa ndi nthawi chabe, monganso ena ambiri m'moyo. Nthawi zina sitipita patsogolo pa liwiro la panyanja. Nthawi zina timafunika kuyima kapena kupita mozungulira. Palibe cholakwika ndi zimenezo. Kumverera kwa kupita patsogolo nthawi zonse kumangokhala chinyengo ndipo kumapangitsa kuti pakhale zovuta zosafunikira. N'zotheka kuti ziwalo izi ndi zakunja chifukwa kusintha kofunikira kukuchitika mkati mwanu kuti mutenge sitepe yotsatira ya moyo.
Pakhomo Kudzimva kukhala wokakamira m'moyo: choti uchite kuti utuluke panjira? idasindikizidwa koyamba mu Pakona ya Psychology.
