Kodi mukudziwa komwe chilimbikitso chokomera moyo wanu chimachokera? Kodi mukudziwa zomwe zimakulimbikitsani kuti mudzipanikize, kuti muchite zonse zomwe mungathe, ndikusintha zinthu?
Ngakhale tonsefe tikufuna kukula, luso lathu ndikukhazikitsa dziko labwino, chowonadi ndichakuti, sitimachita izi nthawi zonse. Sitimasankha mwayi wabwino nthawi zonse, kutichitira zabwino kapena kuyenda njira yabwino, ngakhale tikudziwa kuti ndi chiyani.
Nthawi zina timangolola kuti gawo lathu laubongo lipambane lomwe likufuna kupulumutsa zidziwitso. Gawo limenelo la ife lomwe limakhala lotetezeka mu malo otonthoza. Lolani ulesi upambane masewerawo. Timakhazikika mu inertia ndikupanga mpata wozengereza.
Kuthetsa mphwayi za tsiku ndi tsiku sikophweka. Tonsefe tikudziwa kuti ndikosavuta kudziponya pakama pambuyo pa tsiku logwira ntchito kuposa kupita kumalo ochitira masewera olimbitsa thupi kapena kuthamanga, ngakhale tikudziwanso kuti kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndikwabwino kwa inu.
Komabe, pamakhala nthawi zina pamene chochitika m'moyo chimafewetsa chilichonse, chimagwedeza ulesi wathu ndikutipatsa mphamvu zomwe timafunikira kuti tisinthe miyoyo yathu. Chodabwitsachi ndichakuti, ngakhale nthawi zambiri zochitika zofunika izi zimafuna kuyesetsa ndi kudzipereka, m'malo motilanda mphamvu zomwe zimatilimbikitsanso.
Ichi ndichifukwa chake anthu ambiri amatha kuchita zabwino atakhala makolo, atapatsidwa ntchito yovuta, kapena kutha chibwenzi chomwe chakhala kwa zaka zambiri. Malongosoledwe a zomwe zimadziwika kuti "chododometsa cha kuyesetsa" agona pa mtengo wokhazikitsa, monga akufotokozera Scott H. Young.
Kodi mukudziwa ndalama zolipiritsa?
M'moyo watsiku ndi tsiku ndizosavuta khalani moyo pawokha kulowetsedwa. Timadzilolera kutengeka ndi inertia, ndikulola zizolowezi zotsutsana kuti zizindikire mayendedwe amoyo wathu. Mwanjira imeneyi timapewa kupanga zisankho mosalekeza ndikusunga zinthu zakuthupi ndi zidziwitso.
Koma mukangolowa kumeneku, ndizovuta kutuluka.
Ichi ndichifukwa chake anthu ambiri, ngakhale atakhala onenepa kwambiri, amapitilizabe kudya zakudya zopatsa mphamvu zopitilira muyeso. Ichi ndi chifukwa chake anthu ambiri amakhala ndi maubwenzi oopsa omwe, mwanjira ina, amakhala osatekeseka. Ndipo ndichifukwa chake timakhala otanganidwa ndi ntchito yomwe siyikutikhutiritsa, koma yotipatsa chitetezo.
Kusintha mayendedwe azinthu ndikuphwanya chizolowezi kuli ndi zomwe titha kuzitcha "mtengo wothandizira". Njira iliyonse yakukula payokha imayenera kulipira ndalamazo. Mtengo wothandizira ndi kuchuluka kwa mphamvu zomwe timafunikira kugwiritsa ntchito kusintha zizolowezi zina ndikuwonetsa zosintha m'dera lathu.
Chosangalatsa ndichakuti, ndalama zoyeserera zikaganiziridwa, zimakhala ngati tili ndi ufulu wopitiliza ndi zosintha zomwe zimawoneka ngati zovuta kwambiri kapena zodula. Vuto latsopano lomwe limatikakamiza kuti tituluke m'zizolowezi nthawi zambiri limakhala poyambitsa zosintha zina zabwino.
Tikakhala ndi cholinga chomwe chimatilimbikitsa, chidwi chimafalikira mbali zina zamoyo ndipo, mwanjira ina, chimachepetsa ndalama zoyambira. Chifukwa chake sizachilendo kuti kusintha kwakukulu kutsatidwe ndikusintha kwina m'malo osiyanasiyana amoyo.
Kwenikweni, tikayamba kupita ndikadutsa gawo lina la kuyesayesa, china chilichonse chimakhala chosavuta komanso chachilengedwe. Ichi ndichifukwa chake munthu amene amasankha kuyamba kuthamanga nthawi zambiri amayambanso kudya athanzi komanso amakhala ndi nkhawa ndi thanzi lawo lamaganizidwe. Kusintha kumodzi kumabweretsa kwina.
Khama monga cholimbikitsira mwa icho chokha
“Palibe chilichonse padziko lapansi chomwe chili choyenera kukhala nacho kapena kuchichita pokhapokha chitanthauza kutopa, kupweteka, kuvutika… Sindinayambe ndasilira munthu amene moyo wake unali wosalira zambiri. Ndinkasilira anthu ambiri omwe akhala ndi moyo wovuta ndipo achita bwino ", analemba Theodore Roosevelt mu 1910.
Roosevelt sanali masochist, amadziwa kuti khama lokha ndilolimbikitsa kwambiri, mwamphamvu kwambiri kuposa zonse zomwe zimayendetsa machitidwe athu. M'malo mwake, akatswiri amisala ku University of Toronto amafotokoza kuti ngakhale timakonda kuyanjanitsa khama ndi mphotho ndikusaka mphotho zodzipindulira tokha chifukwa cha khama lomwe tapanga, kwenikweni khama palokha ndilopindulitsanso komanso mphotho.
Khama limawonjezera phindu pazomwe timapeza, koma lilinso ndi phindu mwa ilo lomwe sitiyenera kulinyalanyaza chifukwa ndi chida champhamvu chomwe chimalimbikitsa machitidwe. M'malo mwake, zotsatira zina zitha kukhala zopindulitsa kwambiri chifukwa cha khama lawo. Mwanjira ina, sitili okhutira ndi zomwe takwanitsa monga ndi kuyesetsa komwe tapanga. Tikumvetsetsa kuti zomwe zili zofunika sikufikira cholinga koma kukula panjira.
Izi zikutanthauza kuti pamene tikufuna kupanga kusintha kwakukulu m'moyo koma tikumva kuti tili mumsampha ndi ulesi, tifunika kupeza zomwe ziyenera kumenyedwera ndikulola kuthana ndi mtengo wothandizira. Izi ndizodziwikiratu. Chosangalatsa ndichakuti tikadzuka, zikhala zosavuta kuti tisinthe.
Koma pali "msampha" womwe tiyenera kudziwa. Zambiri zomwe timafunikira kuchita kuti tikule, kukonza ubale wathu pakati pa anthu, kapena kukhala ndi moyo watanthauzo sizongolimbikitsa mwa iwo okha komanso mtengo wake wokhazikitsa ndiwokwera kwambiri.
Kuti tithane ndi msamphawu tiyenera kupeza chifukwa chokhacho chochitira china chilichonse, chilimbikitso chomwe chimatikakamiza kuti tizichita zinthu mozama komanso chofunikira kutipatsa mphamvu zomwe timafunikira. Palibe njira zachidule, aliyense ayenera kupeza chifukwa chake chifukwa zomwe zimalimbikitsa wina sizikhala zofunikira kwa wina.
Chitsime:
Inzlicht, M. et. Al. (2018) Khama Lododometsa: Khama Lonse Lili Lofunika Ndipo Lofunika. Miyambo Yogwiritsa Ntchito; 22 (4): 337-349.
Pakhomo Chododometsa cha kuyesetsa, kupeza chifukwa chosinthira moyo wanu idasindikizidwa koyamba mu Pakona ya Psychology.
