Anxiety can become very distressing. It deprives you of calm and balance by making you sink into apprehension. Worries take over, taking your breath away. In that state, everyday life becomes a challenge.
The symptoms of anxiety generate such discomfort that it is understandable that you focus on those feelings and desires that they disappear as soon as possible. Being at the mercy of recurring thoughts, having difficulty sleeping, feeling paralyzed or even on the verge of death when having a panic attack it is not pleasant at all.
However, while these symptoms can be very painful, there is often a deeper underlying problem that needs to be addressed. Sometimes the underlying problem isn't anxiety, but low self-esteem. In that case, when you improve your self-image, you will also improve your ability to handle the ups and downs of life without experiencing the pangs of anxiety.
What is the relationship between low self-esteem and anxiety?
In 2019, a group of Vietnamese and Dutch psychologists carried out a study with more than 1.000 adolescents and young people. They found that "Those with low self-esteem were twice as likely to develop anxiety symptoms as those with adequate self-esteem."
It's not the first research to reveal a relationship between low self-esteem and anxiety. In 1993, psychologists from the universities of Arizona and Colorado claimed that “Self-esteem acts as a buffer against anxiety”. They found that adequate self-esteem reduces the defensive distortions that are often at the root of anxiety.
A year earlier, these same psychologists developed an experiment in which they discovered that increasing self-esteem greatly reduces anxiety in various situations, from the prospect of death to the anticipation of a painful stimulus.
In fact, low self-esteem acts as an "internal" threat. That negative image erodes your well-being, so you become your own worst enemy. In fact, your emotional brain, whose job is to warn you of threats, does not distinguish between external dangers and those created by your mind.
It simply detects maladaptive, catastrophic and pessimistic thoughts generated by low self-esteem and labels them as a threat to your psychological balance. Then respond with anxiety, condemning yourself to live in a permanent state of fight-flight. Cortisol skyrockets and your performance plummets. In this way, anxiety ends up strengthening low self-esteem, making you believe you are not capable of anything. It paralyzes you.
The 3 signs that low self-esteem is behind anxiety
1. Thinking too much about rejection
Rejection hurts, no doubt about it. Nobody likes to feel left out or rejected. However, most people process these experiences and move on. Conversely, those with low self-esteem tend to get stuck in experiences of exclusion and disapproval, allowing them to determine their own worth and feelings about themselves.
So, if you are dwelling on the possibility of others rejecting you, excluding or disapproving of your behavior, you may be stuck in a cycle of seeking acceptance. Since you are not convinced of your worth, you need a constant stream of external confirmations, so you end up depending on the opinions of others.
That approval seeking will make you care more about the image you project. You will begin to doubt at every step. You will wonder how they will interpret your words and attitudes. You will develop a hyper vigilant attitude with your "flaws" and worry excessively. As a result, anxiety will skyrocket.
Instead of spending an enormous amount of energy seeking the approval of others, focus on accepting yourself and learning to love yourself. You don't need anyone to remember how much you are worth. Surround yourself with people who love and accept you for who you are, not people you have to "conquer" and impress.
2. Run away from challenges
Challenges are opportunities for growth. Whenever we face a new situation, we learn or get stronger. But people with low self-esteem are afraid of taking risks and don't like being involved in demanding activities. They prefer to stay in theirs comfort zone.
The problem is that, over time, that comfort zone narrows more and more and the prospect of leaving that space where everything is more or less controlled starts to generate anxiety or even panic. Anxiety can keep you from taking on new challenges and doing what will help you become more confident.
It is no coincidence that a study conducted at the University of Durham found that people with low self-esteem and anxiety implement fundamentally avoidant and repressive strategies, that is, they prefer to escape from problems rather than face them.
But if you run away from challenges you will never be able to test yourself and know how far you are capable of going. If you allow low self-esteem and anxiety to shape your world by drawing the worst catastrophes, you will be left in a very small space where you will never be able to develop your full potential.
Instead of getting stuck in your head, go back to the present. Whenever you notice that your thoughts are following the paths of apprehension, go back to the present and generate more realistic ideas. The more you trust yourself, your abilities and your ability to manage what happens, the less anxiety you will experience and the better you will be able to cope with problems.
3. Be a perfectionist
Perfectionism, low self-esteem and anxiety often go hand in hand. The common factor is usually the gap between expectations and reality; that is the difference between how things are and how you want them to be. People with adequate self-esteem accept and feel good about who they are and what they do, so they don't have to strive for something incredibly perfect.
Instead, people with low self-esteem try to "alleviate" their continuing disappointments through the pursuit of perfection. It is difficult for them to feel completely satisfied with their results, simply because they feel an inner dissatisfaction with themselves. Although they achieve incredible things, the idea of not having achieved perfection overshadows success, fueling a negative image of themselves.
That need for perfection can make you feel like there's always a mistake to fix or a problem to fix. This feeds the overexertion, taking anxiety to stratospheric levels. Perfectionism can be exhausting and extremely demoralizing if left unchecked. Remember that perfection is a chimera. It is more productive to spend all that energy on tasks that make you feel good, instead of chasing impossible ideals.
Finally, if you suffer from anxiety, it is understandable that you are trying to find different ways to get out of this state, but consider that if these attempts are unsuccessful, they can accentuate the feeling of failure, which will fuel low self-esteem and increase even more. anxiety, closing a vicious circle from which it will be increasingly difficult to get out.
In order not to get stuck in that cycle, it is best to seek professional help. Anxiety can be managed so that it does not become a hindrance in your life, but sometimes it is necessary to have someone to guide you in developing and applying the appropriate strategies and avoiding relapses.
Sources:
Benéitez, B. (2022) Qué es el 'yo' en Psychology?: Las claves de cómo nos percibimos a nosotros mismos. In: The Vanguard.
Fernandes, B. et. Al. (2022) The Mediating Effects of Self-Esteem on Anxiety and Emotion Regulation. Psychological Reports; 125 (2): 787-803.
Nguyen, D. et. Al. (2019) Low Self-Esteem and Its Association With Anxiety, Depression, and Suicidal Ideation in Vietnamese Secondary School Students: A Cross-Sectional Study. Front Psychiatry; 10:698.
Greenberg, J. et. Al. (1993) Effects of Self-Esteem on Vulnerability-Denying Defensive Distortions: Further Evidence of an Anxiety-Buffering Function of Self-Esteem. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology; 29 (3): 229-251.
Greenberg, J. et. Al. (1992) Why do people need self-esteem? Converging evidence that self-esteem serves an anxiety-buffering function. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology; 63 (6): 913-922.
Admission Do you suffer from anxiety? Maybe it's due to low self-esteem was published first in Corner of Psychology.
